Midnight deadline?

It seems as if every night I am posting at or just after midnight. It feels like I have a midnight deadline or something.   I need to get to bed earlier!  I am a natural night owl, but truth be told, I am exhausted every night by about 10 pm.  I just can't get my head to settle down at the same time my body is ready to.

We had a great day at Lake Tomahawk in North Jersey today with the in-laws.  They have a great spot specifically for little ones, so they can romp and slide without getting knocked over by bigger kiddos.  Here are a few favorites from today...

eta: I was having trouble uploading my pictures again so this was not published until the morning, in case the post and the publish time make no sense.  But what is really annoying is that blogger does not recognize recently uploaded pictures until I have restarted the computer.  

late September already?

This past week was super hectic and all my good intentions to update this blog went right out the window. September has been insanely packed from the get-go, actually and I rather hope that it calms down a bit.

My co-worker who was out for a broken leg is back and we are now really getting underway.  I actually have a schedule for this week and I am excited to throw myself into it all.  I know that I will be very busy in the weeks and months to come and I am pretty happy about that.  Leaving Lilly breaks my heart almost every morning as she clings to my leg and tells me she wants to go to work with me.  I know that she is fine and playing with Vin within minutes of my departure, but the crying just adds to my sadness at being away from her all day.

I really love working and feeling as if I am using my graduate degree for which I worked very hard.  I know that I need to work, regardless of how I feel about it.  I am very fortunate to be home so early in the day, as compared to my friends who take the train into NYC and get home by 7pm.

I just miss her so and I want to be the one to teach her and play with her and....I could go on and on.  Vinnie is doing well with her while I am gone and she goes to her daycare 2 days a week now.  She is having a bit of a hard time adjusting to that, but I knew that was likely.    She has friends in school and she learns so much from them.  She comes home singing new songs and is counting in English and Spanish and recognizing many letters.  She loves to pretend play and it has become more complicated and involved.  She is starting to really recognize simple feelings, both in herself and others.  Lilly is just growing up before my very eyes!

Regarding my exercise and eating habits....it all went out the window, but is about to walk right back in that door.  I want to go to they gym, I was just insanely tired the first few weeks of school, and then did not feel too hot this past week with the blasted allergies.  This week I start again.  Back to the gym and back to healthier eating.  I promise!

It feels as if I am propping my eyes open with toothpicks

Lordy am I tired.  This week was so emotional.  It started out with Mother's Day and my birthday on Sunday, being let go on Monday, having an interview on Thursday and finding out on the way home that another co-worker was let go, some other in-between crap and tomorrow is my Convocation.  I am about to go upstairs, read my book U is for Undertow Kinsey Milhone Mystery and listen to some Enya:  A Day Without Rain.  Reading helps my mind empty itself of any crap floating around.  The music calms my soul.  I know that playing Enya to relax is played out.  I get it.  But it still works for me.  And at this juncture, whatever works will be utilized to its fullest extent.

Last night I did not go into Lilly's room when she started crying at 10pm.  She fell back asleep.  She did not come into our room until 5am-ish.  Tonight I let her cry again for about 5 minutes.  So far she went back to sleep.  It is so hard as a parent to stay out of the room.  We had gotten pretty good at letting her cry and recognizing her different cries.  After she was sick and had the last few seizures I did not leave anything to chance and went in if she cried for more than a few minutes.  It is difficult for me to let go of that need to check on every little whimper.  However I am doing her an injustice by not letting her fall asleep on her own.  She became accustomed (very quickly I might add) to getting up around 10pm and hanging out with us.  But 2 y.o. girls need their sleep and so do their parents!!

So what the heck am I still doing awake???  Blogging and finishing the dishes and feeding the cats.

Happy weekend!!