Just when I think my life is coming along and maybe getting to the point where I am feeling good about what is going on, life throws me a curveball. I was going to use another phrase that has profanity in it, and it's not that I don't mind a good curse; I just changed my mind. But click on the link to see the urban dictionary definitions of that other. It made me smile, maybe even chuckle.
It is not a story that I can tell at this time, or maybe ever. It is not mine to tell, yet it has affected me deeply. If I don't write anything funny or witty or anything even for a little while, this is why.
I will keep plugging along and do what I need to do. Now, maybe more than ever, that means taking care of myself first so that I can take care of the others in my life.
On another totally different note, a blog I follow, Momastery, had a recent back-to-school post. As a teacher and a mother, I loved this post and this letter. I totally plan on using it myself, both appropriately abbreviated now for my preschooler, and as is, with name changes, as Lilly gets older. It is about compassion. Please read it. Use it with your children. Use it as a reminder to yourself.
I bet if you ask every teacher you know, most would say that they consider September to be their New Year. If you are not a teacher, do me a favor and close your eyes and think back to when you were a student. Do you remember that feeling of excitement and new revitalized energy? The knowledge that this was youryear? That is how I feel every September. How lucky am I? I love the feeling of a fresh start.
I always think of the movie You've Got Mail at the point when Tom Hanks tells Meg Ryan that he would send her a bouquet of freshly sharpened pencils. I have a fond memory of getting brand new pencils and the pencil case. And the Trapper Keeper! My favorite had kittens on it.
But there is also a nervousness, a bit of anxiety even, about how everything is going to work out in the upcoming year. There are always changes and part of being a good teacher is going with the flow. This year I will not be working with my friend Julie anymore and that makes me so sad. She is an amazing school social worker and friend and I was honored to work with her for 2 years. Her new district is lucky to have her. Also one of my team members is expecting her 2nd baby and I am so excited for her! But I also know that means we have to ramp up our work to get it all done and get into those classrooms.
If you follow my blog you probably realized that I had a tough year last year. If you know me IRL you know just how tough that year was. I really wanted my home life to not interfere with my work life but is that realistic? I was out for 3 days when Lilly had her EEG testing. I was out for a few sporadic days when Nanny was getting sicker. I was out for a week when she died. You can see why the teachers saw less of me than I or they wanted. I still think that I did a good job. I just want to do even better this year!
Getting back to my New Year theme, I decided this year to really make some resolutions this September. I actually don't like the word resolutions, because it always sounds like something that will be broken. Maybe I should say that I made some decisions about how I am going to conduct and live my life during the school year. Being that I am entering my 3rd year in my position at work I now know some things I need to do to be successful. I have also been living a healthier lifestyle, so that necessitates change to my daily work routine as well.
Make and bring lunch every day
You might think this is a no-brainer and it often was. But it needs to become an everyday routine, not a "Wow I have enough leftovers" kind of thing. I really believe that bringing my lunch every day to camp helped me lose weight and I want/need that trend to continue!
Prepare (wash and iron) outfits on the weekend
Again, you might think nothing of this. I did well in the beginning of last school year but that went out the window by the end of October. Nothing stresses me out more than trying to pick out an outfit at 6:00am. Well, maybe trying to get Lilly to pick out an outfit at 6am is more stressful, but you know what I mean.
Get enough sleep
I have to be at work earlier this year due to contract changes. I cannot be late. I must go to bed on time so that I can get up on time and get my butt out the door. Besides, I just need more sleep! This leads me to...
I need to walk in the mornings before work
I always have wonderful intentions to exercise when I get home from work. Or after Lilly is asleep. This year I am trying to get more early intervention clients, which would get me home later. After Lilly is asleep I tend to just sit on the couch. And play silly facebook games. I don't exercise. Plus my dog needs a lot of regular exercise. This is in line with the getting enough sleep issue. I need to go to bed earlier so that I can get up early enough to walk in the mornings. I would love to get some yoga in, too. Maybe I can alternate mornings....yoga or walking.
Be organized in general
There is a lot of paperwork involved with my position. There is a lot I need to do to remain accountable to my boss, the superintendent, and the state. I also need to stay organized at home so that I can follow through with all the above resolutions. I am creating a schedule for myself and my family for cleaning, grocery shopping and even cooking. I want to cook or prepare meals on the weekends so that I always have food ready to go for dinner. I want to live in a clean, organized home. We can do this!
I know that it may seem like a lot, but the truth is that I have been doing a lot of this already. I just need to be consistent and follow through once the school year begins. Sometimes that can seem so overwhelming that I lose my routines. But I know that routines in the face of transitions and change are when they are most important.
I feel blessed to get this fresh start every September! What are your New (School) Year resolutions?
Here we are at the tail end of my summer break and I am facing all the expectations that I promised myself I would not have this year. In the beginning of the summer I had written about my usual laundry list of expectations for my summer break and had said that this summer I will not have that list. I promised myself that I would not stress out about not completely de-cluttering and re-organizing my house. I am happy to say that I did not let myself get too stressed about it all. In normal summer mode I would be disappointed with what I did not get accomplished this summer. This summer I am happy with what I did get done around the house. A lot of it was just the daily cleaning that occurs with a smallish house and a preschooler. :) I also worked on my bedroom; and even though it is not completely finished there is a HUGE improvement. (Okay, Vinnie might not agree with the huge part. lol)
Looking back on what I had written in early July, I initially wished that I had done more craft stuff with Lilly and arranged a few more playdates. Some people I had reached out to for playdates were not available and that is okay, even if a bit disappointing. And sometimes the timing just did not work out. Maybe I wasted a few too many mornings doing nothing. And then I realized all that we did do! But we did go on tons of fun playdates and attended our library's summer preschool reading program. We visited friends and family down the shore and at lakes. We explored different playgrounds in our area. I reconnected with many of my girlfriends, attended a great free music festival and traveled to North Carolina.
Personally, I started on the path to a healthier, running me. Of course this past week has been difficult with the area still recovering from hurricane Irene. Not to mention my ankle/Achilles tendon is being a bit funky. But I am committed to continuing this healthier lifestyle once school resumes next week.
I have to admit that today I was starting to feel that ball of anxiety in my belly about not organizing the basement or finishing my bedroom or insert chore. But I stepped back and took a deep breath and looked at what I did. And if I took a lot of naps this summer, maybe it was because I needed them. I reminded myself that I had surgery the 2nd day after school let out and I was also ill in July. And if Lilly is disappointed that I did not play princesses or babies with her every time she asked, I console myself with the knowledge that she would have me play every possible minute. And dinner does not cook itself! So in that I learned about the balance of being a SAHM again. It is not all fun and games. Chores have to get done, too.
I hope everyone else had a fun summer! What was your favorite thing you did this summer? Come on...leave me some comment love!!!
