catching up

In the past 2 weeks or so I have been really busy updating my resume, writing a cover letter and applying for some jobs online. I hate writing my resume. I always feel like I can make it better and so then I never feel like it is finished. Oh well...I have to start sending it out ASAP.

Lilly has learned to climb. This is huge because she now wants to climb everything! She is so funny but now I am so nervous that she is going to hurt herself. What happened to the old-fashioned play pen. The pack&play is just not an option to keep her contained anymore because she is too tall for it.

This past weekend while we were out at my in-laws in the Poconos Lilly started splashing in a puddle on the driveway. I eventually moved her to the grass because I was really uneasy with her on the asphalt. I just worry about her pretty face getting scratched or hurt. Well, when I took her in to nurse her and put her in for a nap she was getting so antsy. Every time she rubbed her hands together she was flinching and making little cries. It turns out that she had scraped the pads of her fingers raw playing in the puddles. I felt terrible. I had tears in my eyes as I was trying to see the extent of the damage. She seems to have recovered now, but it took a couple days. Every time she would pick up a strawberry she would drop it. How sad is that? If you see the pictures, she had a great time with her Grandma & Grandpa & aunts & Anthony.

Some good news is that she more or less has a nap schedule now. She has been consistently taking solid morning and afternoon naps. She even slept for 2 5-hour stretches last night, with a nursing break around 2. In some ways I cannot wait to get rid of the morning nap. I am totally tied down with the 2 nap thing. But I am so grateful that she is sleeping that I try not to complain.

Another good thing is that Vinnie and I have been arguing less. Is it reaching that 1 year mark of parenthood? Is it less sleep deprivation? Maybe, but whatever it is I am thankful.

I have a Flickr account now. Check out my pictures! I am in the slow process of uploading all the old pictures. Unfortunately a lot of pictures when the external hard drive got accidentally reformatted. Luckily I have them on Shutterfly and/or Snapfish so I have to order CDs with the pictures. Most of Lilly's birth and newborn pictures were among those lost so I definitely want to get those CDs soon. Anyway, enjoy the pictures.

Lilly is now awake so I am off to get her!

Pigtails

I put in Lilly's 1st pigtails today. She looks adorable, but also a little older. That makes me sad. Now I know why people have more babies! :)

Prayers

One of the blogs I started following was about a young mom whose baby was born with anencephaly. I think that is what it is called. Faith lived just 3 short months but her life touched mine deeply. When I was checking my blog updates today I saw that she had passed away yesterday. I will say prayers for your mom and family tonight baby Faith. Check out the blog here.

exercise and such

I am finally fed up with all the weight that I am gaining back. I had lost sooo much weight after I had Lilly. It was like it had melted off. Well, that was short lived. I think that #1 I was gaining back some of the fluid I lost when I hemorrhaged after Lilly's birth and that #2 I had to regain some of the muscle I lost. I lost weight during my pregnancy (12 lbs) and then gained about 5 pounds back at the end of it. Then by my 6 week postpartum visit I was a total of 40 pounds less than my first maternity visit. So by the end of my pregnancy and all last summer I had no butt and skinny arms and legs. Anyone who knows me that I don't naturally have skinny arms or legs and I have a butt. I am just built that way...pretty muscular. So, in my head, I know that some of the weight I gained back was muscle. I have my normal butt, arms and legs back. But when I step on the scale, my heart sinks. #3 is that Lilly is not nursing night and day. She still nurses a lot, but nearly what she did before food. The combination of the 3 factors has lead to me gaining back 20 of those 40 pounds. So, okay, I am still 20 pounds less than I was before I had Lilly. But I still have a lot to loose.

And to be honest, I don't want to diet. I hate dieting and I don't think it really works. I always find ways to cheat but still stay on the plan. I don't want to be a sneaky eater. I want to be an honest eater. So I am trying to make better choices. Not let myself get to the starving point. Drink enough water. Move my body most days of the week.

Today I went for a good-paced walk pushing the jogger (and Lilly) with my friend Caroline in the park. Also, instead of napping during Lilly's morning nap I did the 20-minute Winsor Pilates DVD. My core strength is just completely depleted since pregnancy and a c-section. My belly is actually the only thing that really bothers me.

Off to bathe and nurse Lilly girl!

Happy Belated Birthday Grandma!

I meant to post this on May 14th, which would have been my Grandma's birthday. Alas, things got busy and it slipped my mind. Yesterday, as I was walking Lilly I saw that all the Irises were in bloom. Grandma loved irises. One year when she was living in the senior housing I took her to the Presby Iris Gardens in Montclair, NJ. I have such great memories of that small trip because it was something that I could for her. I know that she had her faults. But she was also funny and quirky. She was so far from the little old granny crocheting in her rocker, it was not funny. She would have loved Lilly. Man, do I miss her sometimes.