Martin Luther King, jr. Day 2010

I am home today from work, in observance of Martin Luther King, jr. day. In years past I was reflecting on the life of MLK for the week or so leading up to the holiday because I was planning and executing lesson plans about him. This year I did not really reflect on it until today. My first reflection was on our world. I believe that MLK's vision will not be complete until equal rights are given to everybody. That includes those with disabilities and homosexuals. Specifically I am thinking about same-sex marriage, a hot button topic these days. Disability rights is often considered the last frontier in equal rights.

More importantly I have been self-reflecting. Where is the peace within myself? How are my daily interactions with my spouse, daughter, friends and family members? What do I do to make sure that I can be at peace? Is there anything I do or that happens on a regular basis that makes me feel not at peace? How can I change my circumstances so that I do not put myself into situations like that?

How could the world change if more people self-reflected on their own inner peace?

Mickey :(

Mickey is one of my mom's dogs. He is the best. He was a rescue, naturally. A big Australian Shepard with an even bigger heart. Well, Mick has cancer and my parents will be putting him down when we have all said our good-byes. Vin, Lilly and I will go over today.

So here is a little bit about Mickey, or Mickalla as I often called him...

He has an insatiable appetite. Literally...he was terrible! Some things he has eaten over the years: a huge tub of I can't believe it's not butter, a jar of Tiger Balm, uncounted numbers of make-up...he was especially fond of foundation and lipstick, bags of chocolate....He loves the finer chocolate, whole steaks off the grill or counter, and the list could go on. It is not really his fault. He was a starving pup when my mom took him in. A wild thing! He would jump (all 4 feet) up on the kitchen table and start helping himself. My mom quickly trained him not to do that!!

He is my mom's shadow. He would follow her to the ends of the earth. When my mom has gone away he would sit and stare at the door. One time I was there and had to move her car. The poor thing was so excited when I came in because he thought she was home.

When I was newly pregnant with Lilly he would come sit by me and put his head near my belly. After Lilly was born and I was staying at my mom's he would come get someone when the baby would cry. He would have a very concerned look on his face as if he was saying, someone take care of that baby! Now he is Lilly's best bud. She calls all dogs "Mick". My mom's other dog, Finnegan, cannot be trusted around children so he is always in another room or outside when we are there. Mick has shown Lilly true doggy love. He lets her hug him and brush his hair.

Mickey will leave a big hole in all our hearts when he is no longer physically with us, but his spirit will be with us forever.

Have fun up there with Shannon, O'Hara and Puss, Mickey. Give them all a lick and a nudge from me.

Lazy Sundays?

Now that I am working Sundays have generally become my biggest day of work, as opposed to the traditional day of rest.

Here is what I have done and need to do today: Went to 1/2 Mass (because Lilly could only make it through half); came home and made breakfast for Vin, Lilly and myself; washed the dishes and pots from last night and emptied/refilled the dishwasher; put Lilly in for nap; worked out at the gym (cardio & stretching); as I came home Lilly was waking up so I heated up lunch for all of us; gathered laundry and started it; now I am blogging :); need to do about 3-4 more loads of laundry and put it away; go grocery shopping; cook dinner; get Lilly's stuff ready for daycare and my stuff ready for work; make lunches; bathe Lilly and get her to bed.

Generally I like lists. I like to write them, look at them, cross things off of them...you get the idea. Sundays list is so daunting that I just try to get through it by routine. Because that is the kicker of it all...this is not an extraordinary Sunday. This is a regular, every Sunday thing. Granted Vin helps out. But I still feel like mostly everything falls upon my shoulders. I guess it is a good thing I have such broad shoulders.

Day 1!

So I did it! Yesterday Vin & I joined the gym up the block and today I went for the first time. I weighed myself this morning and faced my reality. I am really trying to remember that the number on a scale is just that - a number. A piece of information about me. It is not me. It does not dictate who I am or how I am feeling on a particular day. Okay, that last thing is wishful thinking. But sometimes when you think something it is. Wow, would my college philosophy professors have a field day with that one!

Progress notes to follow....

Oh, and why is it that the night you want to get out of the house the baby won't go to bed????

A Lilly year in review

Since January 1, 2009 Lilly has learned to:

cruise
walk
climb
say Mama, Dada and now hundreds of other words
pretend play with her baby & kitchen
use some sign language
appropriately say Please and thank you (and now says welcome)
pick out what book she wants to read
"read" her books on her own
communicate many of her needs & wants
trust her daycare caregivers
make friends
give hugs and kisses
play independently for a few minutes
run

Wow! I might add to this list as things occur to me. I love you sweet baby girl! I can't wait to see what you learn this year!

New Year = New Goals

As 2009 drew to a close, I realized that I had accomplished my big goal for the past several years. I finished graduate school! I won't be walking until the May ceremony but I am finished with my classes. I am just awaiting grade and that very expensive piece of paper. I have some new goals for 2010. Most of these are things that had to get put aside as I finished school as a FT working mom of a toddler. Yikes! When I think of all I had to fight through, or maybe work through sounds better, I am even more proud of myself for having done it. I don't think that anyone would ever say that I am not persistent. Or stubborn. Either one. I think that did me well in this case. Without persevering I would have quit a looong time ago. I mean, I wrote papers while nursing Lilly. Literally. I would lay her across my lap and nurse her while I propped the laptop up in a way that I could type. Craziness.

So, my new goals/resolutions/whatever we want to call them today.

1. Exercise - Totally went out the window when I started working.
2. Eat healthier/cook more - Also went partly out the window when working and taking 2 night classes. Lots of take-out and quick, not necessarily healthy meals.
3. Organize - I sometimes feel like I am drowning in paper.
4. Pay down debt - Believe it or not I am still paying off credit card debt that was accumulated before the un-wedding and the aftermath. Plus there is added debt that I/we are committed to paying down/off. Being a SAHM for 17 months may not have been the best financial decision, but I don't regret one minute I was home.
5. Go to church more often. - I just have not gone, not made the time and I regret that.

I know that they are the stereotypical resolutions that everyone makes. But in some way that makes me feel better. I am not alone in my need to make positive changes in my life. I had wanted to join the gym before this week so that I was not like all the other new members starting on the 1st. How silly is that! Maybe the momentum of others around me will help propel me forward.

Tangentially, Vinnie will be starting school in January. I will be supporting him as much as I can in this huge, but necessary endeavor. It will be great if some of his almost 9 years of Navy experience would count toward something academically speaking. He will be working full time as he starts and I know how hard it can be. I hope that I can be organized enough to have lunch and dinner packed for him on the nights he has school. He also has class Saturday morning which will take a Herculean effort on his part. He likes to sleep in, as evidenced by the amount of times I have been able to sleep in on a weekend. I know he can do this. I am not sure if he realizes how much a Bachelor's Degree can change his life. He can go in a totally new direction of he wants! How exciting!

Okay, off to make some coffee. I went to sleep a little before 2am and I was up a little after 6am. Good times.